Arohanui

For Jonathan…..
My darling nephew, at the other end of the world, 5000 miles away, in New Zealand, it is winter. Although there is no snow in Auckland, there is definitely cold and fog and rain and frost…
Some days, it is very hard to remember what it is like to be warm and to feel the sun. Some people here suffer from a kind of depression, in winter months, that the doctors call “Seasonal Affective Disorder” or “SAD”.
And today, I was feeling very sad, not because of the weather, but because you have left us...
I was crying because I do remember you, Jonathan.

I met you when I was visiting Malaysia in the year 2000. I remember your gentle smile and your quiet ways. You were asking about the way things were when your mother and the rest of us oldies were young. You enjoyed listening to the stories and were curious to know more. Your bright eyes were watching me from behind your glasses. You seemed much older than your years. And maybe you were.
Your mother tells me you wanted to visit us in New Zealand. Well, now you can come and go anytime, can’t you?
And I believe I might have seen you today…
I was out in the cold and wet garden when I noticed some new green shoots of the earlicheer and jonquils I planted years ago. Their leaves were pushing up from among the weeds and dead leaves. And then, I saw you….one single beautiful daffodil by the letterbox. One brave golden little yellow flower with the shy and nodding head.
I cried. Then, I laughed.
That first daffodil reminded me that this winter too, shall pass. It reminded me that all is not lost, that the cold and wet days will not last. And that, with the passing days, the sun will grow strong again and that spring and then summer will surely come….very soon, around the next corner.
Jon, I do not know if it was you with me today but is does not matter.
I know you are in a far better and warmer place now. Why else would you have left all those who love and cherish you so much - your mother, your father, Zane and Summer, your cousins, aunties, uncles, grandmother, all the family and friends? Yes, that place must be miles better because you are a smart kid, and you would have chosen wisely.
But, all the same, I feel sad for me. I feel sad because I would have loved to have my family meet and get to know you. They would have loved you. And you would have loved them back.
Jon, I will remember you as I watch the cold winter days grow shorter…
I will remember you as I watch the first greening of the spring flowers…
I will remember you as I see that daffodil by my letterbox turn its face to follow the sun….
And long after this winter is gone, I will remember you each and every time I talk with your mum or any one of those who knew you because they will continue to bear witness to, and celebrate your life and your living. You will live on in those who love and treasure you, those who will surely miss you. In that way, you will live on for, in and through all of us.
So, my beloved nephew, pass gently and bravely into that winter then, for we will surely see you again when the spring comes around.
And until that day we meet again, as we say it in New Zealand:

“A-ro-ha-nui” - All our love, and
“Ha-e-re ra, ha-e-re ra, ha-e-re ra!” – farewell, farewell, fare thee well!

from your uncle Jack, your cousins Jason, Sarah and Bennett, and auntie Tess.